I’d be asking you those tough questions. You already know the questions. The ones that we ponder in our hearts and we want so desperately to ask, but we are afraid of hurt feelings or overstepping into that private place that says Do Not Enter or Keep Out. These are the most important questions, yet we hesitate. I am guilty of remaining silent far too often only because I fear the response. Those sign posts again.

If I was your true friend, then I would ask you:

How is your spiritual life?

Are you praying? Reading your Bible?

How can I pray for you today?

What are your struggles? Hopes? Dreams?

Past friendships never heard me ask those questions, when I knew I was supposed to ask them. Now I see these women struggling, drifting away, falling into a place I’m sure they never dreamed they would go. I stand at the shoreline of our friendship and they have drifted so far away. I wonder if they are happy. I am not happy for them.

Slowly I am learning to cast aside the fear, to speak up. To run after another crying girlfriend who just walked out the church door.

If we were friends away from the confinements of this cyberworld, then I would be having you here for dinner or coffee. I’d have your kids play with my kids, especially on a day when you needed a break because raising kids, especially if you homeschool and are with your kids more than usual, is exhausting work. Our husbands could hang out by the grill, we ladies would no doubt be in the kitchen. I’ll wash, if you dry. We would laugh together, cry together.

I hope you would answer the tough, difficult questions with honesty because if we are truly friends, then we shouldn’t have to fear.

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