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I’ve been the mother to a teenager daughter for several hours. So far, so good.

I have a friend who has two teen daughters, has been a mother to teens for years. She’s way ahead of me in experience. My friend frequently tells me of the angst, drama and emotional horrors that come with teens, especially with girls.

When she gives her speech, going on and on about said horrors and how she might not have become a mother if she had know the tears she would shed over her girls, inwardly I’ve got my hands over my ears and I’m stomping my feet in frustration. (Who did that in books? Was it Ellen Tebbits? I can just see her, droopy socks in saddle shoes, pigtails askew.)

I don’t care much to hear my friend’s negative comments on teen girls. I want to form my own opinions, have my own experiences. Why do I need to expect these years to be hell as a mother?

I think we all know some teens freak out when they get to this age. Some stay the course and remain like normal people. I expect my girl to make mistakes, to have hormones, to be in a place of figuring out who she is because that’s what young people are supposed to do.

I have no intention of hanging her out to dry here, on my public space, when she has no voice to give her side.

All this to say: my firstborn is now what is commonly referred to as in the teen years, aka a teenager. I’m going into this new area of parenting with my heart full of anticipation. I look forward to watching my girl grow into the young lady the Lord would have her to be.

I’m realistic but not defeated before the train has barely left the station.

Thirteen is not three. Three was a tough age with all my kids.

Thirteen will not be the same as fourteen. A lot happens in a year.

All the years beyond this one will only be better in the sense that the both of us will be better at this parent-and-teenager dance. Give and take. Back and forth. She grows. I grow.

We both change.

No one will be able to change my mind on that point.

Are the mom to a teen daughter? Tell me about her.

 

Curiosity Journal : July 6, 2011

Welcome to my Curiosity Journal, a weekly exercise in which I keep track of what I, as a busy, homeschooling mom of four, have been doing in reading, playing, learning, reacting and writing.

On Monday, we sang Happy Birthday to my boy, Edmund, who is now nine. I include this picture due to it’s completely goofy nature. That’s Susan blocked by the arm of Peter. That guy on the right is my big bro, John, aka Uncle Pizza.

Reading: I’m reading the first Harry Potter book aloud to my boys. They hang on every word, especially eldest boy. Peter is my biggest fantasy fan of all my children. So far (fantasy story fan, not number of children).

I read Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone when it first came out in trade paper. I liked the writing, liked Harry, but I had many voices warning me of the bad influence of witchcraft that I never read the rest of the series. At the blogging conference I attended recently, my roommate raved about the books.

She’s not the first Christian I’ve come across who loves these novels.

Honestly, it’s confusing. I know the warnings in Scripture about witches. Yet all the believers who call these books friends . . .

Opinions? Let me have it.

Playing: Mahjong on my iPhone. I can’t get enough! I’ve known of mahjong for years (remember the opening scene of Joy Luck Club?) but never played, now I want to get a game set that we can use for Game Night. Anyone have an opinion on mahjong for kids?

Learning: This week I want to mark a milestone in learning for one of my children: Lucy, who finally, FINALLY put her entire face into the swimming pool. She’s six, and like the rest of my tribe, resisted true swimming because of the getting-the-face-wet-thing. Well, yesterday was finally her turn to take the plunge.

We cheered her on. Susan promised her a new Barbie if she did it, the same bribe I tried on her years ago when learning to swim. I got teary; my baby is a swimmer!

And Lucy slept with her new “Ariel” doll last night.

Reacting: I didn’t watch one second of the Casey Anthony trial, I certainly have no clue as to all the evidence presented to the jury, so why does the verdict bother me so much? Is it because I’m a mom?

Writing: A poem. Perhaps someday, I will share it . . .

What was your week like in reading, playing, learning, reacting and writing?

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